I hate asking for help.
I’m not worried about ruining my image as supermom extraordinaire. That ship sailed a long time ago. My reluctance is rooted in the fear that people will resent me for asking. How dare I think that my needs justify someone else’s time? Plus my fabulous work ethic came with a side order of guilt for expecting anyone to do my work for me.
It’s ridiculous. It’s not like the people I know are assholes. I have lovely, generous people in my life. And I say yes to requests from them all the time. Yet I have to work up the nerve to ask for little things—advice, a few minutes of time, a playdate for my kids.
I mean, it’s not like I’m asking for money.
So today I asked for help. First, I asked a few friends to be my supporters on stikK.com, a neat tool for reaching goals. You commit to doing something—exercise, quit smoking, get by with fewer Starbucks trips—and if you fail to meet your goal each week, the site donates money to charity or to an anti-charity (an organization that supports the opposite of what you believe) on your behalf. You can invite supporters to watch your progress, the idea being that their support and the prospect of succeeding—or failing—in front of an audience will motivate you.
My stickK commitment began a few months ago, but I hadn’t asked for supporters because I didn’t want to trouble anyone. Well, I haven’t met my commitment (exercising 5 times a week) for the past two weeks, so I figured it was time to call in reinforcements. But I worried: will it take up too much of their time? Will they be annoyed? How embarrassing will it be if I fail…repeatedly?
Two of the three people I asked have already told me they are happy to do it. The third one either hasn’t checked her e-mail or is busy deleting me from her phone. Time will tell.
I also asked my wonderful friend, Lyn, to help me pull together a better banner for this blog. Design-ish things are not my forte, but they are right up her alley. Besides, the anonymous man walking down the lane is getting old (although the sheep are just adorable).
So we have that to look forward to.